When someone is grieving,
how we respond matters.
I’m working to change how people understand, navigate & support grief.
Through speaking, education and programmes, I offer practical, research-informed ways to support people in their own grief, and to support others, in ways they can experience as helpful.
We aren’t taught how to navigate grief, or how to support others (adults or children) when they are struggling to cope with the unimaginable.
I believe most people genuinely care and want to support those around them, yet they rarely know how. Support can become awkward, avoidant, overwhelming, or unintentionally unhelpful.
Consequently, grief is often managed alone, masked in front of others and experienced in silence. When people are in greatest need of support, it is most absent.
It doesn’t have to be this way.
With a better understanding of grief, and practical ways to to respond to others, people can feel more confident offering support in a way that can be experienced as helpful. And, those who are grieving can feel more understood, supported, and less alone.
I’m Dr Shelley Brunskill-Matson.
I help people navigate grief, and show up for others, when life gets messy and hard.
As a grief and suicide-loss specialist and grief support researcher, educator and practitioner, I’ve spent my career supporting thousands of individuals through life’s most difficult times, equipping them with the practical tools that work for them.
Recognised as a global authority on supporting children and families after suicide loss, a leading voice on grief support, and founder of the mattering-reinforcing care approach to grief support, I help individuals and teams explore how to live and work, while grieving. I don’t offer empty platitudes or false positivity. Instead, I bring grounded hope, evidence-based insights and practical tools proven to make a difference.
Whether you are grieving yourself, of doing your best to support others who are, I can help.
My goal is simple: to bring hope, agency and genuine care to life’s hardest moments.
Looking for a Speaker your audience will thank you for booking?
If your organisation employs humans, we should chat.
Because at some point, life gets hard. And when that happens, loss, grief, and disruption don’t stay neatly outside the workplace. They show up in how people think, feel, work, and relate to others.
I work to improve how grief and suicide loss are understood and supported, in ways that are actually helpful.
I believe most people genuinely care and want to show up for those around them when life gets messy and hard, yet they often don’t know what to say or do, so they do nothing.
I get it. None of us are taught about grief, how to navigate it or how to support others, in schools, or in leadership programmes. And yet, it doesn’t have to be this way.
By learning practical ways to cope, and to support others, including colleagues, friends and family, we can move from feeling unsure and awkward, to confident and present. More importantly, those who are grieving can feel less isolated and alone, and instead feel understood and genuinely supported.
We can’t change what has happened.
But we can change how we respond.
A highly experienced speaker and facilitator, I take complex research and theory and translate it into practical, human insights and tools that can be applied immediately.
Whether I’m delivering a keynote, facilitating a masterclass or hosting a webinar, I speak about some of the most difficult, and most human, experiences we face.
Not just how people cope, but how we support them in ways that make a genuine difference.
This is why my work resonates: because it reflects real life, and offers something useful, when it’s needed most.
If you, or someone you know, have been bereaved by suicide, consider joining one of my 4 online small-group education and support programmes:
1) Navigating Suicide Grief
2) Living With Suicide Loss
3) Who Am I Now?
4) See Me, Hear Me (for parents supporting children after a suicide)
Suicide loss can be particularly difficult. My programmes provide an opportunity to come together with others who “get it”, and together learn research-information tools to help you make sense of what you are experiencing and find ways of coping that work for you.
Separate programmes are run for bereaved parents, spouses, adult children, siblings and other groupings, so you can connect with others who truly understand.
Grief support after a suicide
If you are an HR Professional, People Leader or CE seeking grief education and support for your workplace, contact me to discuss my Grief Literacy training.
One in four employees will be grieving at any given time, and that grief comes to work. The impact and cost of unsupported grief is very real: productivity, absenteeism, presenteeism, staff moral and staff turnover can all be negatively impacted.
I offer a range of sessions, from 90-minute through to full-day options. Partner with me to show your staff you care, and to equip them to better support themselves, and each other, through life’s most difficult times.
Grief Literacy for Workplaces
“Just amazing - research, knowledge, practical, passionate, authentic. Thank you Shelley.”“Articulate, informative and highly practical. This session was a real game-changer for me. Thank you!"“A quality workshop; the information was invaluable, the authentic delivery with passion and no apology was amazing."“Shelley radiated such a 'heart' for the subject matter. I came in with very little knowledge and now feel equipped."Work with me
There are a number of ways to work with me, depending on your context and what you’re looking for.
Speaking
Keynotes, Presentations, Talks & Q&A Panels
Ensure your audience if left feeling more confident and able, with practical tools to help them navigate their own grief, and support others who are grieving, in ways they can experience as helpful. Every keynote and talk is tailored to its audience, and provides practical, research-informed information that people can take into their work and everyday lives, effectively immediately. Grief is the most universal of all human experiences, meaning my keynotes and talks, resonate across all audiences and contexts.
Training
Masterclasses & Workshops
Empower and equip your teams to know how to support others in their grief, or to navigate loss and change themselves when life has been disrupted. I offer a range of topics, each designed to be highly practical and based on the latest research. My work is focussed on taking the awkwardness and guesswork out of grief support, and ensuring people can be supported, their way.
Increasingly, the masterclasses and workshops I offer sit across two key areas:
Grief support & education within workplaces
PD for professionals supporting grieving children
Click on the links above to find out more, then contact me to discuss your specific needs.
Public Sessions
Webinars & Programmes
Through webinars, learn practical, research-informed tools to better understand grief and how to support yourself, or others, in a way that can be experienced as helpful. These small-group, live webinars offer practical guidance tailored for different audiences, including parents, professional and those supporting someone in their personal lives.
My programmes include a series of four programmes for adults affected by suicide; providing an opportunity to come together with others who “get it” and together learn ways to cope, make sense of what has happened (as best you can) and find ways to foster an ongoing connection with your loved one, and, when you’re ready, explore issues of changed identity. You can learn more about these programmes here.
Join my newsletter to know when new webinar and programme dates are released.
My Bio
Highlights
25 years experience providing grief and suicide loss support education to individuals, teams, organisations and communities, globally
Global authority on supporting children after suicide (postvention)
Founder of the Mattering-Reinforcing Care approach to grief support
PhD: Mattering: Children’s Experiences of Care & Support After Suicide
TEDx Speaker - topic: “Rethinking Care and Support for Grieving Children”
Creator of Matika, Skylight Trust’s group education and support programme for children
Creator of the My Grief, My Way series of grief support resources for children
Co-Founder & Director of Tony’s Place (www.tonysplace.org.nz), a charity that supports adults and children affected by suicide
Founder & Owner of The Grief Shop (www.thegriefshop.co.nz)
Author of What Are You Waiting For? A Practical Guide to Knowing What You Want and Making It Happen Now (Exisle Publishing, 2015)
Author of Your Grief, Your Way (coming soon)
Other aspects of my work
Tony’s Place Charitable Trust provides free age-appropriate support to children, teens, adults and whānau affected by suicide - visit www.tonysplace.org.nz
The Grief Shop provides a range of grief support-specific products. This online store was created to make it easier for people to show others they care (providing thoughtful and lasting alternatives to flowers!), or to support people in their own grief - visit www.thegriefshop.co.nz
