Support after suicide matters.
I’m working to change how people understand, navigate & support suicide loss.
Through speaking, education and support programmes, I offer practical, research-informed ways to support people in their own suicide grief, and others, in ways they can experience as helpful.
We aren’t taught how to navigate suicide grief, or how to support others (adults or children) when they are struggling to cope with the unimaginable.
I believe most people genuinely care and want to support those around them, yet they rarely know how. Support can become awkward, avoidant, overwhelming, or unintentionally unhelpful.
Consequently, suicide loss is often navigated alone, masked in front of others and experienced in silence. When people are in greatest need of support, it is most absent.
It doesn’t have to be this way.
With a better understanding of suicide and suicide grief, and practical ways to respond, people can feel more confident offering support in ways that can be experienced as helpful. Those who are grieving can feel more understood, supported, and less alone.
I’m Dr Shelley Brunskill-Matson
I help people navigate suicide grief, and show up for others, when life gets messy and hard.
As a grief and suicide loss specialist, and postvention researcher, educator and practitioner, I’ve spent my career supporting thousands of individuals impacted by suicide, equipping them with practical tools that work for them.
Recognised as a global authority on supporting children and families after suicide loss, and a leading voice on suicide support, I am the founder of the mattering-reinforcing care approach to grief support, I help individuals and teams explore how to live and work while grieving. I don’t offer empty platitudes or false positivity. Instead, I bring grounded hope, evidence-based insights and practical tools that can make a difference.
Whether you are grieving yourself or doing your best to support others who are, I can help.
My goal is simple: to bring hope, agency and genuine care following suicide loss.
Ways to access support
One-on-one support
Research-informed support and guidance for adults and children affected by suicide.
Programmes
Small-group online programmes designed to help people better understand and navigate suicide loss, their way.
Free videos & resources
Practical videos and resources to support people affected by suicide.
Public webinars
Learn practical, research-informed ways to better understand suicide loss and grief, and how to support yourself or others in ways that can be experienced as helpful.
Speaking & training
Keynotes, workshops and professional development focused on suicide prevention and support after suicide
Workplace support
Practical education and support to help workplaces respond well after suicide.
“Just amazing - research, knowledge, practical, passionate, authentic. Thank you Shelley.”“Articulate, informative and highly practical. This session was a real game-changer for me. Thank you!"“A quality workshop; the information was invaluable, the authentic delivery with passion and no apology was amazing."“Shelley radiated such a 'heart' for the subject matter. I came in with very little knowledge and now feel equipped."Video library
Here you can see a sample of the videos available in the video library.
Click here to view my growing collection of free videos and resources, designed to support you in your grief, or to help you support others.
Programmes
If you, or someone you know, have been bereaved by suicide, you may want to join one of my four online, small-group education and support programmes:
1) Navigating Suicide Grief
2) Living With Suicide Loss
3) Who Am I Now?
4) See Me, Hear Me (for parents supporting children after suicide)
Suicide loss can be particularly difficult. My programmes provide an opportunity to come together with others who “get it”, and learn research-informed tools to help you make sense of what you are experiencing and find ways of coping that work for you.
Separate programmes are run for bereaved parents, spouses, adult children, siblings, and other groupings, so you can connect with others who truly understand.
Workplace support
If you are an HR or People & Capability professional, people leader, or CE seeking to support for staff impacted by suicide, contact me to discuss your specific needs.
Whether an individual, team, or entire workforce has been affected by suicide, the right support matters. One in four employees will be grieving at any given time, and that grief comes to work. The impact and cost of unsupported grief are very real: productivity, absenteeism, presenteeism, staff morale, and staff turnover can all be negatively impacted.
I offer a range of sessions, from 90-minute to full-day options. Partner with me to show your staff you care, and to equip them to better support themselves and each other through life’s most difficult times.
My Bio
Highlights
25 years experience providing grief and suicide loss support education to individuals, teams, organisations and communities, globally
Global authority on supporting children after suicide (postvention)
Founder of the Mattering-Reinforcing Care approach to grief support
PhD: Mattering: Children’s Experiences of Care & Support After Suicide
TEDx Speaker - topic: “Rethinking Care and Support for Grieving Children”
Creator of Matika, Skylight Trust’s group education and support programme for children
Creator of the My Grief, My Way series of grief support resources for children
Co-Founder & Director of Tony’s Place (www.tonysplace.org.nz), a charity that supports adults and children affected by suicide
Founder & Owner of The Grief Shop (www.thegriefshop.co.nz)
Author of What Are You Waiting For? A Practical Guide to Knowing What You Want and Making It Happen Now (Exisle Publishing, 2015)
Author of Your Grief, Your Way: A Practical Guide to Navigating Suicide Loss (coming soon)
Other aspects of my work
Tony’s Place Charitable Trust provides free age-appropriate support to children, teens, adults and whānau affected by suicide - visit www.tonysplace.org.nz
The Grief Shop provides a range of grief support-specific products. This online store was created to make it easier for people to show others they care (providing thoughtful and lasting alternatives to flowers!), or to support people in their own grief - visit www.thegriefshop.co.nz
Looking for a Speaker your audience will thank you for booking?
If your organisation employs humans, we should talk.
Chances are, most of your staff have been impacted by suicide, either directly or through others they care about. When a suicide happens, loss, grief, and disruption don’t stay neatly outside the workplace. They show up in how people think, feel, work, and relate to others.
I work to improve how grief and suicide loss are understood and supported in ways that are actually helpful.
I believe most people genuinely care and want to show up for those around them when the unimaginable has happened, yet they often don’t know what to say or do, so they do nothing.
By learning practical ways to cope, and support others, including colleagues, friends and family, we can move from feeling unsure and awkward to confident and present. More importantly, those who are grieving can feel less isolated and alone, and instead feel understood and genuinely supported.
We can’t change what has happened.
But we can change how we respond.